If you love casinos, you are sort of obligated to love casino carpets.

Rio has begun installation of what can only be described as the ultimate casino carpet, an utterly glorious addition to the pantheon of legendary casino carpets.

The best part of sharing Rio’s new carpet is it’s the perfect excuse to mansplain. As if we need an excuse, but still. Drum roll, please.

The human eye can distinguish up to 10 million colors. Typically, not all at once.

Rio’s new carpeting checks all the boxes.

First and foremost, casino carpeting must help disguise stains and wear. Honestly, a plane loaded with giant tanks of multi-colored paint and glitter could crash on this carpet and nobody would be the wiser.

Second, the carpet is distinctive. It’s one-of-a-kind, as is required by casino law. This is why casino carpet fans can identify a casino by seeing just a small swatch of carpeting in a movie, TV show or TikTok video. This is very useful when there’s a casino robbery, often with grainy photos or video, and media outlets fail to included the location of the robbery.

During Rio’s carpet upgrade, it’s business up front, party in the back.

Third, you thought we were going to say something about the carpet being so garish it forces guests to keep their eyes at slot machine level to avoid migraines and motion sickness. That, however, is an urban myth. Shame on you.

Lastly, Rio’s carpet reinforces the brand times infinity. When Rio was purchased from Caesars Entertainment by Dreamscape Companies, they could’ve gone 100 different ways with it, including a rebrand, but no. The name and theme stay, and the tropical vibe isn’t going anywhere.

The carpet has a lot going on, to say the least, including the depiction of various animals, including a monkey.

“Marmoset’ comes from the French word for shrimp. Not the seafood kind of shrimp, the Kevin Hart kind. Because Kevin Hart is short, in case you’ve been living under a rock.

Monkeys will also be prominent in the under-construction Lapa Lounge (previously iBar).

There are also several kinds of birds featured in Rio’s new carpeting, including toucans.

Toucans declare as frugivores.

Rio’s carpet also has a seemingly incongruous object, a balloon. To the layperson, the inclusion of a balloon makes little sense in this tropical motif, but laypersons do not have the benefit of our vast wealth of knowledge acquired following four minutes of arduous Internet research. Balloons are a big deal in Brazil. Hot-air balloon enthusiasts, “baloeiros,” launch sometimes massive balloons in defiance of local laws, taking part in a longtime cultural tradition that sticks it to The Man.

Rio did their homework on this one.

We’ve been keeping an eye on all the changes at Rio, and the results of the vision and financial investment are already paying off. Dreamscape took over operations of Rio from Caesars Entertainment on Oct. 2, 2023.

During our most recent visit, we personally witnessed what’s known in the hospitality industry as “customers.” Shocking, right?

The casino floor was hopping, and the main casino had more energy than we’ve seen at Rio in a decade. The new Canteen Food Hall was bustling.

There was visibly better morale among resort employees, a remarkable evolution at a casino many had written off, including us.

People were having, wait for it, fun. Even we had fun, and we are jaded and tend to have a knee-jerk scoff response to anything resembling change.

Rio’s carpet is more than just carpet, it’s a symbol of a change in attitude. A pivot toward fun.

It’s a statement about where Rio is headed as Dreamscape’s investment continues to show itself across the resort. Rooms have been renovated. Long-dormant venues are reopening (like the Wine Cellar). The pool complex has been given a complete overhaul, same with the resort’s marquees.

The entire exterior of the hotel has been fitted with programmable LEDs.

Visual metaphor alert! We found this random Whoopee Cushion on Rio’s new carpet. No, really. Long story, fellow kids.

Dreamscape has been methodical and deliberate and is delivering on its promise to help Rio regain its glory days, albeit without the buffets and cheesy (but beloved) “Masquerade Show in the Sky.”

Rio has an uphill battle on its hands, given the years of neglect and awkward reviews, but this Rio isn’t that one, and Dreamscape’s $350 million renovation isn’t even done yet.

Rio is cheap, parking is free and while it still has a way to go, our fellow scoffers are in for a pleasant surprise when they revisit Rio.

Rio’s fresh carpeting isn’t the only thing that’s bright, the future seems to be, too.

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